Types of Therapy for Neurodivergent Children: Why a Whole‑Family Approach Can Be a Game‑Changer

When you’re raising a neurodivergent child, you quickly find yourself faced with an overwhelming list of therapy for Neurodivergent Children options. Play therapy. Art therapy. Talking therapy. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). Each promises to help your child cope better, behave better, or feel better.

And while there’s some evidence that these approaches can be helpful- especially for things like managing anxiety or supporting self‑expression- many parents find that traditional therapies don’t quite reach the heart of what’s happening at home.

That’s particularly true for children aged 4- 16, who often don’t see their behaviour as a “problem” and may struggle to talk about their feelings in the way these therapies require.

So where does that leave you?

This is where Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS) stands out. Developed by Dr. Ross Greene, clinical psychologist and author of The Explosive Child, CPS takes a completely different approach. Rather than trying to “fix behaviour,” it works on the real underlying causes- and does it in partnership with the child, not against them.

Let’s look at the more common therapies parents are offered, how they work, and why CPS might be the missing piece you’ve been looking for.

Play Therapy: A Gentle Way In

Play therapy is often one of the first options suggested for younger children. The idea is simple: children use play to communicate what they can’t express in words. In a therapy room filled with toys, art materials, and games, they act out feelings, experiences, and worries while the therapist observes and gently guides.

How it helps:

• Gives children a safe, non‑threatening way to explore emotions.

• Works well for children who are non‑verbal or highly anxious.

• Helps them process trauma or big life changes without direct questioning.

  
  

Where it falls short: For school‑age children with ADHD, autism, ODD, or PDA, play therapy can help them express feelings but doesn’t always provide practical tools for managing meltdowns or meeting daily expectations. Parents are often left watching from the sidelines, unsure how to translate what happens in the therapy room into real life.

Art Therapy: Expressing the Unspoken

Like play therapy, art therapy uses creativity as a form of communication. Whether it’s drawing, painting, or sculpting, children are encouraged to explore emotions through hands‑on activities.

How it helps:

• Reduces stress and provides a calming outlet.

• Allows children to communicate without the pressure of words.

• Boosts self‑esteem and gives a sense of achievement.

  
  

Where it falls short:Art therapy can be deeply therapeutic- but again, it’s limited when it comes to solving the day‑to‑day challenges families face. A child might express their feelings beautifully through art, but this doesn’t necessarily translate into fewer morning battles, calmer homework sessions, or less resistance to everyday demands.

Talking Therapy: The Go‑To for Teens

For older children and teens, talking therapy (or counselling) is often suggested. This involves sitting with a therapist and discussing feelings, worries, and behaviours.

How it helps:

• Provides a safe, non‑judgmental space to talk.

• Can improve emotional awareness and coping skills.

• Useful for teens struggling with anxiety, depression, or peer challenges.

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Where it falls short:For many neurodivergent children- especially those with PDA or ODD- talking therapy can feel too direct and demand‑heavy. It assumes the child has the insight and verbal skills to explore their inner world, which isn’t always realistic. Even when children engage, progress may be slow, and parents rarely get the guidance they need to manage things at home.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Evidence‑Based, but Demanding

CBT is often described as the “gold standard” for helping children with anxiety, depression, or unhelpful thinking patterns. It focuses on identifying negative thoughts and replacing them with more helpful ones.

How it helps:

• Can reduce anxiety, improve problem‑solving, and build resilience.

• Provides practical tools for emotional regulation.

• Works well for motivated children who can engage in structured tasks.

  
  

Where it falls short:CBT relies heavily on verbal reasoning and self‑reflection- skills many younger neurodivergent children are still developing. For PDA children, it can feel too rigid or directive, triggering resistance rather than engagement. And while CBT can help with specific symptoms, it doesn’t always address the root causes of behavioural outbursts.

So, What’s Missing in those Therapy for Neurodivergent children?

While these therapies can be valuable, many parents share the same frustration:

“My child makes some progress in therapy, but at home, we’re still dealing with explosive behaviours, constant resistance, and daily battles.”

This is where Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS) offers something different.

Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS): A Whole‑Family Approach

Instead of viewing behaviour as a sign that a child is being “naughty” or “defiant,” CPS operates on a simple but powerful belief:

“Kids do well if they can.”

In other words, if a child isn’t meeting expectations, it’s not because they won’t—it’s because they can’t (yet). Something is getting in the way, like:

• Poor emotional regulation.

• Inflexible thinking.

• Sensory overwhelm.

• Difficulty understanding or communicating expectations.

  
  

CPS helps families identify these lagging skills and the specific problems causing conflict (e.g., “getting ready for school on time,” “homework after a long day,” “joining family meals”), and then work together with the child to solve them.

How does CPS work?

The process involves three key steps:

1. Empathy: Parents work to fully understand their child’s perspective.

2. Defining the Problem: Parents share their own concerns about the situation.

3. Collaboration: Together, they brainstorm realistic, mutually satisfactory solutions.

It’s a respectful, problem‑solving conversation- not a lecture, punishment, or demand.

Why is it so effective for ages 4-16?

Children in this age group often lack the insight or verbal skills to engage meaningfully in traditional therapy. CPS doesn’t require them to sit on a sofa and talk about their feelings for an hour. Instead, it:

• Meets them where they are- through simple, collaborative conversations.

• Focuses on practical, real‑life solutions (not just theoretical skills).

• Gives them autonomy in problem‑solving, which is particularly powerful for PDA children.

  
  

How is it different from other therapies?

Unlike traditional approaches where the therapist works directly with the child, CPS:

• Coaches the parents to implement strategies at home.

• Targets real‑world problems, not just feelings.

• Builds long‑term skills like emotional regulation, problem‑solving, and flexibility.

Rather than working in isolation, CPS involves the whole family. Parents learn to reduce power struggles, communicate more effectively, and support their child’s skill development every single day- not just during therapy sessions.

What kinds of challenges can CPS help with?

CPS is particularly effective for:

• Explosive behaviours and meltdowns (helping children learn to manage frustration and anxiety).

• School‑related struggles, like refusal or resistance to homework.

• Daily battles around routines (mornings, bedtimes, mealtimes).

• Social difficulties, like making friends or handling conflict.

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It’s especially helpful for children who feel trapped by demands (as often seen in PDA) or who are stuck in a pattern of oppositional behaviour.

Why a whole‑family approach makes the difference

When you focus only on the child in therapy, you miss a crucial piece of the puzzle: what’s happening at home every day.

CPS empowers parents to:

• Understand their child’s triggers and skill gaps.

• Stay calm and proactive instead of reacting in the heat of the moment.

• Create solutions together, strengthening trust and connection.

  
  

This doesn’t just help the child—it helps the whole family. Parents feel more confident, siblings feel safer, and family life becomes calmer and more predictable.

So which therapy should you choose?

There’s no single “best therapy” for every child. Play therapy, art therapy, talking therapy, and CBT all have their place. But if your child:

• Struggles to talk about their feelings,

• Doesn’t see their behaviour as a problem, or

• Has explosive reactions that make family life feel chaotic—

…then Collaborative and Proactive Solutions could be the transformative approach you’ve been searching for.

Final thoughts

Parenting a neurodivergent child can feel isolating and overwhelming, but the right approach changes everything.

Instead of battling over behaviour, CPS helps you work with your child, building skills, reducing meltdowns, and creating a calmer, more connected home.

You don’t have to do this alone—and you don’t need to wait for things to get worse.

Want to see how CPS could work for your family?

👉 Book a free consultation call and start creating a calmer home today.